How The Human Face Might Look In 1,000,000 Years

Forbes.com recently published an article about how the human face will evolve over time. But I don't think they extrapolated far enough.

In 100,000 years: The human face is proportioned to the 'golden ratio,' though it features unnervingly large eyes. There is green “eye shine” from the tapetum lucidum, and a more pronounced superciliary arch. A sideways blink of the reintroduced plica semilunaris seen in the light gray areas of the eyes, while miniature bone-conduction devices implanted above the ear work with the communications lenses on the eyes. Image credit: Nickolay Lamm

In 1,000,000 years: The human face is proportioned to that of 'anime characters,' though it features awesomesauce. There is "eye shine" from the cartooneum characterum, and a more pronounced sense of frivolity. A sideways blink of the reintroduced accent lines above and below the eye seen in the middle of a sentence fragment, while miniature bone-conduction devices are a figment of my imagination. Image credit: Yer mahm

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Mmm... Tropicana "Bug Legs" OJ!

So I bought a brand new jug of Tropicana and I was just waiting to have some cold, refreshing orange juice. I cracked it open: And floating on top was this bad boy. I managed to fish it out and put it under my microscope camera: MMMMMM! Bug legs! I guess when they say "some pulp" I know now what I'm getting! Yeah, I won't be buying it anymore. I contacted Tropicana about my plight. We'll see whether I get my money back.